I am so determined to make my relationships work that maybe I’m missing something along the way.

It’s only the beginning with him but I’ve fallen hard, again. I like him,  I like his attitude, his look, the way his mind works. I like a lot about him. The problem is I like him more than he like’s me.  

I guess its true what they say ‘actions speak louder than words’ these past few days his been off with me. One day we were fine, the next he was treating me like I was a nobody.  

It’s been 5 days since we have actually spoke. Friday night we had an argument, not a big one, more of a disagreement, he was rude so I left. I cried. Got it all out my system then rang him. How stupid of me, he was wrong and I chased him. 

He apologised  over the phone but what does it mean really.  The next day he ignored me. I rang him and rang him and nothing. No response.  He was posting on Facebook and ignoring me, knowing I knew he was.  5 hours later he rang me, so when I ask he tells me “you’re asking too many questions”. Now, if wasn’t suspicious before I am now. 

Once again he gave me an apology. Over text. Once again it’s not enough.  How can you ignore someone you supposefly care about.

“I like you more than you can understand”

“I want to be with you” 

“You deserve to be treated better” 

When ? By who? I don’t see any of this from him. Last night he rang me, after not talking to me since Saturday. He tells me a story.  “I was out and I was drunk and this girl was dancing on me and inviting me back to her place, but I didn’t go, I wasn’t interested because all I was thinking about is you” 

That’s great ! So why you are not showing me that ? Why you not treating me as if you don’t want to lose me, why do you speak so much but show me nothing. His words and his actions they do not what should I think ? What should I feel? 

I haven’t slept. I’ve cried myself to sleep. I’ve held back my anger and pain. Cos he don’t deserve to get to me that way. He don’t deserve my heart if he don’t know how to take care of it.  


2 thoughts on “Relationship

  1. Wow, I feel a hypocrite in commenting cos my relationship started exactly like this. He’d say the same things to me. How there was a girl but he came back to me. I persisted cos my self esteem was too low to leave and I didn’t think I deserved better. Two years later and he treats me much better. I still don’t feel like I’m getting what I deserve but he treats me much better. I chased him as u have. I made him stop flirting to this other woman who called him six times a day. And three years ago, I even forgave him for cheating on me. Here’s the truth: when a man shows u who he really is, believe him. And right now he’s showing you who he is. Right now, he doesn’t really care about you. He’s probably not ready to commit to a relationship. And it’s likely that chick was dancing with him but the he had no end game so he left. Trust me. If a guy wants you, ud know. U won’t have to chase or get him to apologise or call him back. U won’t have to remind him that u exist and deserve to be treated with respect. He’ll know. I’m not saying end it. I’m saying stop focusing on him and focus on u. Make your life full. Go out have fun. And if he’s worth keeping around, he’ll show up with more than sone cheesy lines

    Liked by 1 person

  2. He clearly likes you …back right off and he will chase you!! I promise.
    Get on with your life for you – not to make a point to him and he will come running.
    Don’t play games – just get happy with you xx


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