I can’t make you love me

Turn down the lights
Turn down the bed
Turn down these voices
Inside my head
Lay down with me
Tell me no lies
Just hold me closely
Don’t patronize
Don’t patronize me

Cause I can’t make you love me if you don’t
You can’t make your heart feel
Somethin’ that it won’t
And here in the dark, in these final hours
I will lay down my heart
And I will feel the power but you won’t
No you won’t
‘Cause I can’t make you love me
When you don’t
When you don’t
Yeah-hh

I’ll close my eyes
‘Cause then I won’t see
The love you don’t feel
When you’re home with me
Morning will come
And I’ll do what’s right
Just give me till then
To give up this fight
And I will give up this fight

‘Cause I can’t make you love me if you don’t
You can’t make your heart feel
Somethin’ that it won’t
And here in the dark, in these final hours
I will lay down my heart
I will feel the power but you won’t
No you won’t
‘Cause I can’t make you love me
When you don’t
When you don’t

Panic ! At the disco 

This is gospel for the fallen ones

Locked away in permanent slumber
Assembling their philosophies
From pieces of broken memories

Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart
Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

The gnashing teeth and criminal tongues conspire against the odds
But they haven’t seen the best of us yet

If you love me let me go
If you love me let me go
‘Cause these words are knives that often leave scars
The fear of falling apart
And truth be told, I never was yours
The fear, the fear of falling apart

Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart
Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

This is gospel for the vagabonds,
Ne’er-do-wells, insufferable bastards
Confessing their apostasies
Led away by imperfect impostors

Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart
Oh, this is the beat of my heart, this is the beat of my heart

Don’t try to sleep through the end of the world
Bury me alive
‘Cause I won’t give up without a fight

If you love me let me go
If you love me let me go
‘Cause these words are knives that often leave scars
The fear of falling apart
And truth be told, I never was yours
The fear, the fear of falling apart

Oh, the fear of falling apart
Oh, the fear, the fear of falling apart

How do you know 

I’ve been in a  few relationships and none have really lasted that long. The guys I have dated have been all very different. In looks, personality, even the feelings. 

I believe we love in many different ways. The obsessive love, friendship love, sexual love, but I believe there is only one true pure love. That one love that consists of all the other loves which makes it so special, and strong. 

I can say I have been in all types of love. If I compare my feelings for each guy I had a relationship with, I see the difference in all of them. I also see that they didn’t really mean that much either. 

How do you really know when you found the one? I don’t think you ever do. I don’t think we know much at all about love. Our world is so scared to express ourselves that we end up damaging one another. 

I’ve been in a relationship with a guy for 10monhs. That has been my longest relationship. Yet neither of us have dropped the ‘L’ word. I’m starting to wonder if the love even is there at all. I’m not even sure how love is supposed to feel. At one point in our relationship I felt I was on cloud 9 but lately that feeling hasn’t been there. Some days it reappears.

I love, love. Love conquers all. All I ever want in life is to be loved.  Truly loved. 

My heart is yours 

My current boyfriend is honestly a good guy, a great friend. When he leaves I don’t know if we will continue to be just friends. Is that really what I want, to be friends with the guy I am in love with , the guy that I want to spend my life with, to see and hear about other girls.  I would be happy for him of course, I wish him all the happiness in the world cos he truly deserves it and honestly I have never felt this way towards someone before, I would rather him be happy with someone else than unhappy with me. For once I truly mean it. It would make me happy to just see him happy. 

100% Happy

What more can I ask for. This ‘summer fling’ is turning into love. 

I know ! It’s crazy. I have truly never felt like this before. It’s a feeling that I can’t explain. It’s ny body and mind doing crazy things to me. When I am with him, I can feel my heart beating all around my body. I just want to smile constantly. When I look at him, my breath is taken away. Even when I just think about him my world is spinning. I can’t explain it. It’s the strangest feeling I have ever felt. 

However, I can not tell him. I dont’t know how, I don’t know if there is any reason to tell him I am falling in love with him? How do you explain something like that ? Where do you even start ? 

I have doubted his feelings for a very long time, but now I know. I know he likes me .. yes like. I want him to love me, of course, but if he don’t, I am okay with that. As long as I am who he wants to be with. For how long ? I don’t know.

Full moon. Palm trees. The waves splashing. Sand in his feet. Holding onto me. Staring into my eyes. He looked around him, looked at me and said with a smile and a nod 

‘yes, I am 100% happy’ 

100% happy. The words are ringing in my head since. I remember feeling the strange sensation all over my body. Like I was on fire. I felt my heart like it was going to just explode. At that point I wanted to say one thing and one thing only. I am falling in love with you. 

But no words came out. I was frozen in that spot with a huge smile on my face saying in my head over and over I love you so much it is crazy