Can I just take a moment to just scream.
I want to stand on top of a mountain, alone, with the sun setting, birds singing, watching the city below and just scream.
Scream at the top of my lungs. Scream until I have nothing left. I want to scream out all my pain, all my memories.
I want to scream till my throat hurts till I have no energy left and I crumble to the floor. I want to hear the silence after the storm, to feel free and empty, to watch the world grow darker and the sky shine brighter. To watch the moon, and see the magic in the stars and wish for nothing simplier.
Do you ever find yourself laying on your bed staring at the ceiling. With no thoughts running thru your mind. Just simply nothing.
I like those days. Those days where my brain just stops working for a while and I feel nothing.
They’re my favourite days.
You’re probably wondering why I’m going through all my past relationships. I’m trying to figure out how I became so broken. I’m trying to figure out how my relationships keep crashing and burning to the ground.
I’m starting to think maybe I’m picking all the wrong types of guys. The thing is relationships don’t work. Not all of them, you can’t be compatible with everyone you meet. You learn about them, see the good and the bad, and from there you fill in the slots.
I’ve realised, I haven’t had time to breathe. No time for myself. I have been too busy trying to make others happy,trying to find that ‘perfect’ relationship.
Time out. For now I will concentrate on me. Let love find me.