Realisation

I am powerful.

I am strong.

Today I realised my self worth. I can’t tell you exactly what it was that made me realise, but its like it hit me, it hit from out of nowhere.

I dated a guy for 18months and not once did he tell me he loved me, I dated him right up until the moment he walked away. Forget the reasons why, they are not important. You got up and you walked and you left me to pick up all the pieces. We were not a team, from day one we were not a team.

For 2 months I have had a fuck buddy. I am a booty call, a quick fuck. At first it’s, what ? Exciting I guess, different, something I have never done before or even consider, up until now. Up unitil I completely gave up, not only on men but also on me. As if I wasn’t worth anything more than just sex.

No. I have had enough .I am worth more. I have a lot to offer, hell I don’t care. I know I have a lot to offer, I am the best fucking thing you called have. Yes I have my flaws, we are humans, we make mistakes, we fix them, we move on to making more mistakes. I am not perfect, neither are you. No person on this earth is perfect. But I am worth more than what I am getting. No, it is not their fault. It is mine. I have allowed my self to think all these years that I am not worthy, today I realised I am.

I will stand tall, I will be nothing less than myself and I will show every single one of you what I am worth. I will no longer me treated like a doormat, I will no longer expect second best, I will not accept to be a dirty sex secret.

No.

I am worthy.